FOR MATOS-MASEI
PLEASING GOALS
It definitely comes with the territory, especially in places such as Chabad of Peachtree City, on Atlanta’s Southside. A family with a tragic story contacted us. Their mother had come to visit from a different state, and she became gravely ill. After surgery, the doctors informed them that she had but a few days to live.
I rushed to the hospital, located an hour away. After some prayers and some discussion with the family, I promised to return the next day. It was not surprising to receive a call first thing the next morning from the family. They called to let me know that: 1) they were “very Reformed Jews”, and, 2) their mother’s wishes were to be cremated. I responded that, to us at Chabad globally, their label was irrelevant, and that the cremation issue would be discussed when I arrived.
The issue of cremation is beyond the scope of this forum. Briefly: In Jewish tradition, cremation tramples on basic human dignity, spiritual integrity, and is an irreversible act. It took an hour to cover all the unacceptable elements of cremating a body of a loved one. I begged them not to do this to their mother. I concluded my presentation with the following: “Despite this being your mother’s wish, I promise that from her current vantage point, hovering between Heaven and earth, if she were able to communicate, she would also beg you not to do this to her.”
The words were hardly out of my mouth when some persistent beeping filled the air. Alarmed, I said, “Is everything okay here?” The beeping, I was told, was a simple reminder about one of the bags of fluid hanging from the machines keeping this woman alive.
Amazed, I said, “If there ever would have been an attempt by your mother to communicate her current wishes, this was it. The odds of this beeping occurring as I completed an hour-long plea, and then mentioning about her communicating with us, are extremely thin. If a sign was needed, here it is.”
The family did not share their decision with me. Two days later, after the woman passed, their talk of a funeral sounded very hopeful to me.
Every once in a while, when engaged in a positive and important action, help shows up unexpectedly. While people should not expect to rely on others in order to accomplish set goals, receiving even a little outside help is always appreciated, and can turn the tide. It also indicates that someone, somewhere, wants to make it happen.
The above explains a story recorded at the end of this week’s (second of two) Torah portion, “Masei,” which is also the final story of the Torah’s fourth book, “B’midbar,” or Numbers. The story actually begins in the previous Torah portion, when the five daughters of a man named “Tzlofchod” appeared before Moses. They said: “Our father died in the desert. He was not part of the group that rebelled against G-d with (the rebel) Korach, but rather, he died due to his own sin. (Our father) had no sons… give us a portion along with our father’s brothers.” (B’midbar (Numbers) 27:2-4.)
Moses was told by the Almighty, “Tzlofchod’s daughters speak well. Give them a portion of inheritance along with their father’s brothers. Transfer their father’s inheritance to them. (27:7.)
These women were requesting a portion in the Holy Land. The Torah does not record any man’s request for a share in the Land. To the contrary: the only record of men and the Land are how they complained about it several times. These women are celebrated, not just by having their request be fulfilled, but also with an unusual nuance: As mentioned above, it was communicated to them that they spoke “well,” or “nicely.”
These women were not alone in being complimented for speaking “well.” Later, in this week’s (second) portion, the Torah utilizes the same complimentary expression. The Torah relates how the tribal leaders of this particular tribe said: “G-d commanded to give the inheritance of Tzlofchod, our brother, to his daughters. Now, if they marry a member of another tribe… their inheritance… will be added to the inheritance of the tribe into which they marry. It will thus be deducted from the lot of our inheritance.” (36:2-3.)
The tribe was concerned about losing part of their Land to members of other tribes who could marry these five women. In response, they were told, “The (representatives of this) tribe (descendants of Joseph) ‘speak well’… the daughters of Tzlofchod can marry whom they wish, but only within the family of their father’s tribe. Thus, the inheritance… will not be transferred from tribe to tribe.” (36:5-6.) The women did just that, and their portion remained within their family.
It is fascinating: When the women requested a portion in the Holy Land, the reaction from the Almighty was how they “speak well.” When the tribe’s leaders desire to protect this portion within their tribe, restricting the women to marry only within the tribe, the Almighty’s reaction is the same.
This story does not end with the Torah’s fourth book. After settling the Holy Land, some 14 years after they arrived, the Jewish people revisited this law of marrying exclusively within the tribe. It was then understood that this was a one-time law, just for the era of dividing the land. Once everyone was settled, it was not a problem to allow different tribes to intermarry and to share the Land. The day this happened, the fifteenth of Av, became the greatest celebration of the year in Temple times, due to this reason (and a few other reasons).
What emerges from the above is remarkable for several reasons: 1) The Almighty is pleased with the women for demanding their own portion in the Holy Land. 2) The Almighty is pleased with the defense of tribal unity. 3) Tribal intermarriage and interaction is cause for the greatest celebration of the year!
Which leads to the following conclusion: When goals are spiritually motivated, they are pleasing. When people set goals, and their focus is to achieve those goals, they can, on occasion, experience a reminder from a Higher Source. These are great reminders that someone, somewhere, is pleased with the efforts, and wishes to see them succeed.
SUMMARY: When a goal is positive and pleasing, one can, on occasion, find a helping hand from an unexpected source.